Annals of Japery

August 11, 2010

Fourth-Grade Summer Reading: Portnoy’s Complaint 9


Portnoy complained about EVERYTHING. I probably should’ve picked Diary of A Wimpy Kid.

April 29, 2010

Are Picture Books Leading Our Children Astray? 19


It’s now widely believed that Outbreak, the 1995 Dustin Hoffman Ebola thriller, was at least partially inspired by Caps For Sale.

April 13, 2010

The Road: A Comedic Translation (Part 5) 1


Yes, said the nameless man to the nameless child, gazing out at the ruin caused by some massive anonymous catastrophe. Thats how we keep things interesting.

March 15, 2010

The Road: A Comedic Translation (Part 4) 2


Their ravenous mouths were sandwichless, the frail lie exposed. A cracked and empty cicadashell. The new world gray and skeletonboned, heavy with reckoning. No barrelpickles anywhere, not even Polish dills.

March 1, 2010

Happily Ever After: Husband and Wife discuss “The Bachelor” 1


My question to you is why does “The Bachelor” — a show with a largely female audience — continue to enforce these sexist stereotypes of what a women can (and in some cases, should) be?

January 20, 2010

The Road: A Comedic Translation (Part 3) 5


I dont know, the man said, and it was truth. He didnt know where all the apostrophes had gone.

December 7, 2009

The Road: A Comedic Translation (Part 2) 6


The city was blackened, burned to completion. No sign of life. Not a hobo nor trollop, tourist nor knishvendor. Cars swimbled with ash, heavy with parkingtickets. Never to be paid nor contested, no weary fist shaken at the judge’s vacant robes.

October 21, 2009

The Road: A Comedic Translation (Part 1) 20


The trees dead, the grass dead, the shrubs dead also. The rivers dead. And the streams and reeds, the mosses and voles. Dead as well.

April 1, 2009

More Celebrity Fiction on the Way 3


The current issue of McSweeney’s includes a short story by Michael Cera, whose contributor’s bio informs us that he was “born in Brampton, Ontario and now lives in Los Angeles,” and, inevitably, that “This is his first published story.” Yes, this becomingly modest debut author is that Michael Cera, co-star of Arrested Development and Superbad […]

November 13, 2008

The Millions is a Little Irritating 2


I was looking at the list of “Top 10 Most Irritating Expressions in the English language,” which was linked to in our recent Curiosities installment (and which is culled from a new book, A Damp Squid: The English Language Laid Bare), and a thought occurred to me. The Millions has been around for nearly six […]